


Yikes

by DittyWrites



Category: Batman (Comics), Batman - All Media Types, Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: F/M, Gen, Honestly this is just a bit of fun, Hux has no idea whats going on but he's gonna roll with it, Minor Violence, as sent to me on tumblr, just a meeting between two completely random characters, not much of anything
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-13
Updated: 2016-06-13
Packaged: 2018-07-14 22:18:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,861
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7193099
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DittyWrites/pseuds/DittyWrites
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rumours of possible Resistance gatherings have reached the ears of General Hux and he is sent to the city in question to investigate. It's a real pity it's Gotham City and possible Resistance gatherings are the LEAST of his problems after he is saved by a mystery woman.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Yikes

**Author's Note:**

> Honestly, i asked for prompts on tumblr and this is what i recieved. It made me laugh out loud so i thought 'fuck it' and here we are 3k later. This is just a bit of fun so please don't read too deeply into how Gotham would fit into the Star Wars universe <3 Seriously. I wrote this in like 2 hrs. 
> 
> Aside from that, enjoy xx

Previous to this little excursion, Hux had never even heard of the planet which Gotham City was located on but given the current situation he was rather looking forward to burning it off the map for the remainder of time.

His instructions had been to investigate the rumours of Resistance gatherings within this city on one of the furthest planets which was contained within the Outer Rim. He had made some inquiries with others and he was mildly surprised to discover that the planet had never been previously investigated by the First Order.

And the first impressions were very poor. The city was shrouded in darkness despite it being the early evening and the vehicles which the people possessed were not even advanced enough to fly. Perhaps due to this, the rumours of Resistance movements had shown to be false. There was no obvious hint that the Resistance were here and it was unlikely that they would choose to hide in such a backwards planet.

However, that did not mean that they did not face resistance from the inhabitants.

Their ships had landed on the outskirts on the city and as the marched towards the centre they were confronted by many fleeing civilians with only a few brave enough to take on the invading troopers.

But things had changed when they reached the heart of the city.

Almost as soon as they arrived in the main street the troopers were soon being attacked by what he assumed were the local law enforcement which govern the area. Their use of metal bullets instead of blaster fire was proving to be an issue as the bullets were small and powerful enough to penetrate the trooper armour. However their numbers were limited and it looked likely that they would soon be easily overrun by his forces.

Until the creatures arrived.

Appearing suddenly from various places in the rooftops, these creatures were proving to be a much more difficult task. Flying down from on high, around a dozen of these various creatures were taking out his troopers with a practised ease. He suspected they were human but it was difficult to tell from his position behind the troops but he was loathe to admit that he could admire their efficiency and skill.

Throwing a hand forward, he sent his remaining two flametroopers into the fray. They immediately marched forward and the air was soon filled with the acrid smell of smoke. He kept a tight hand on his own blaster as he surveyed the area around him. The high buildings would be perfect for sniper fire and he kept a wary eye for any sign of movement.

His fears did not come to anything however as a dark figure dropped in front of him. As he straightened up, Hux could definitely tell that it was a human male who was wearing a leather jacket and some form of red helmet.

“So you're the one leading these troops?” The man said and even through the altered tone, Hux could tell that he was young. Younger than him anyway.

Sneering with disdain, Hux answered, “My name is General Hux and these are clearly my troops.”

“I don't really care to be honest, i'm going to arrest you anyway. Normally I would kill you but I promised the Bat i'd play nice since he called me in for an emergency.” The red helmeted figure responded casually.

Without hesitating Hux drew his weapon on the fool. Unfortunately, the boy was just as fast and pulled out twin pistols and aimed then directly at his face.

“Well now, isn't this awkw-” The boy started but his sentence was cut off as he was knocked many feet away by a sudden blow from a new presence. The helmeted boy landed on the ground and glanced over before disappearing in a sudden cloud of smoke.

Eyes wide as he watched him disappear, it took Hux a moment to look over at whoever or whatever may have just saved his life.

As he took in the individual's appearance, his eyes widened further as his mouth fell open in a comical style.

Watching him with curious eyes, the figure, clad head-to-toe in a black and red costume, held out a hand to him,

“Heya! Name's Harley Quinn! Pleased to meet'cha!”

 

x-x-x-x-x

 

Hux was so shocked he couldn't even speak. He was used to seeing people in various types of clothing and battle gear but this was something else entirely.

The red and black block pattern was only broken up by a few small diamonds in certain areas and the face was covered with white paint with the exception of the eyes and lips which were marked with black and red, respectively. Atop the head was a pair of what appeared to be horns with small white baubles on the end. He glanced back down at the costume and he was amazed by how skin-tight it was, every single curve of the woman's body was emphasised.

“HEY! Eyes up here Mistah!” Harley exclaimed as she watched the mystery redhead eyeing up her costume, “Ya not even gonna say thanks?!”

Blushing slightly as he realised he had been staring, Hux met her gaze with his own. His rude retort caught in his throat as he recalled how this small woman sent the helmeted man flying through the air with little more than a kick.

“I apologise,” he inclined his head, “your style of dress is unfamiliar to me. I have never seen anything like it.”

“Aww, sweet-talker! It's hot isn't it!” Harley posed for a moment before wagging her finger in his direction, “But you better not let Pammy hear ya say that! She'll feed you to her babies.”

Raising an eyebrow at the odd expression, Hux chose to ignore asking for more information.

A loud whistle caught both of their attentions.

Glancing up at a nearby rooftop, the helmeted man had reappeared and in his hands he held a large weapon which Hux recognised as a launcher.

“I'm going to get into a lot of trouble for this!” The man cried before pulling the trigger.

The rocket sailed through the air towards the duo and Hux heard the woman, Harley she called herself, gasp loudly. He felt a strong grip on his arm as he started to run in the opposite direction from the impending rocket.

They couldn't outrun the blast though and Hux felt the explosion hit as something solid collided with his back and he found himself thrown through a nearby glass window, landing on the hard ground with a harsh thud.

Stunned, he lay unmoving as he allowed his senses to catch up with him.

He could feel one or two small cuts on his exposed face as they started to sting and the smell of burnt clothing invaded his nose. His head was still ringing with the blast and it took a few moments for it to return to him. Squinting in the darkness, he glanced at his communicator and was horrified to see that the blast had temporarily disabled it.

Sighing deeply, he attempted to stand up but as he tried to push up he realised that he could not move his legs.

Panic seized him as he pushed himself up. If his legs were broken or trapped then he would be at the mercy of this hell-hole city until one of his troopers found him. Forcing himself to assess the damage, a small groan of relief left him as he took in the sight of the small woman lying across his shins. She must have been the object which smashed into him when the explosion went off.

Pulling his legs out from underneath her, he allowed her to fall fully to the floor. Brushing himself off as he stood, he bent over her to assess if she was dead or alive. He put one hand out and rolled her over from her front onto her back and he had to fight off a small smirk as her wide blue eyes stared back at him.

“Yikes!” She exclaimed and broke into a coughing fit. “That was a bit of a doozy.”

“How are you unharmed?” Was the first question to spring into Hux's mind. This tiny woman had taken the main brunt of the blast and yet she looked, at worst, mildly discomforted by it. That blast would have seriously injured anyone he knew.

“Red gave me a special mix of stuff that makes me super fast and strong and stuff. It also makes me tough.” Harley explained as she sprang to her feet and started to stretch out her body. “She gave me a top-up a couple a' days ago so i'm stronger than usual but it'll go away soon.”

“An injectable strength enhancer?” Hux asked, his interest peaked, “Do you know the formula?”

“Nah, Red doesn't really tell me. I suppose Doctah Crane might be able to work it out but i've never asked Red what it is. I just take it.” Harley shrugged.

Hux sensed opportunity. “Would this Red be interested in a meeting with the First Order? Technology such as that could have important applications.”

“The First who?” Her expression was confused but it soon turned into a frown, “Red doesn't like men all that much so I don't think she'll help ya. Sorry.”

“I insist that you arrange a meeting.” Hux fisted his hands at his side, he would not allow an opportunity like this to pass by. The woman also seemed to have no idea who he was or of the First Order but given this planets distance from civilisation he supposed that perhaps they did not involve themselves in galactic politics.

Harley put her hands on her hips, “Now you listen here Mistah! I don't know who you think ya are but if Pammy doesn't want to see ya then i'm not gonna let you or your First Morter people anywhere near her! I love Pam and I ain't gonna put her in danger for a guy I just met.”

Realising that he may have overstepped his mark and eager to learn more, Hux backed off. “My apologies. I am just very impressed with how...advanced some of your science would appear to be. I am a General for my people and it would be advantageous for us to have an accord.”

“You sound like Mistah E!” Harley giggled. “All these fancy words and long sentences. I haven't had ta do that since I earned my doctorate.”

“You are a doctor?” Hux exclaimed in surprise. He had assumed that woman was a hired mercenary or some form of warrior for this city. But a doctor? A doctor who was also a trained fighter, what kind of place was this?

“Psychiatrist. I use to help all the loons become less loony and then I met Mistah J and I realised that sometimes things ain't so black and white.” Harley spoke nostalgically but she narrowed her eyes as she saw his weapon. “That's a weird lookin' gun. What's it do?”

“This is my blaster.” Hux answered in slight confusion, had these people legitimately never seen a blaster before?

“Can I have a shot?”

“No.”

Her bright blue eyes blinked at him in pleading, “Pretty please?”

“It is coded to my fingertips. You will be unable to use it.”

“That's booooring. Do you wanna see my hammer?”

A little suspicious of the way which that had been worded, Hux answered tentatively, “Yes?”

He blinked and in the time that small task took, the woman had produced a massive red and black striped hammer from...nowhere.

Blinking again, his eyes darted around her body again as he tried to work out exactly where she had pulled such a large item from.

“Cool ain't it?” Harley preened as she leaned on its handle.

“Umm...yes?” Hux nodded uncertainly, again being put on the back foot by this strange woman and her abilities.

Changing the subject, Harley eyed the mystery redhead up, “So what's a cutie like you doing in Gotham City?”

“Cutie?” He was mildly affronted by the presumptuousness and over-familiarity of such a statement but he overlooked it in favour of keeping her friendly. “We were here to investigate reports of Resistance movement. Supreme Leader Snoke sent me here personally.”

“Supreme who? What a stupid title.” Harley scrunched her nose up at the unfamiliar name. “So where are ya from? I liked your planes, are they American?”

“What?” Hux hissed. She had not even heard of the Supreme Leader and if he was inferring correctly, she had also assumed that he was from another sector of this planet. Closing off his expression, he chose to play his cards close to his chest, “I am not from this area. My 'planes' are typical of those from my home.”

“Gotcha!” Harley winked conspiratorially, “So ya gonna try and kill Bat-brains? Cause I gotta tell ya it's harder than it looks.”

“Umm...no?” He had no idea what a 'Bat-brains' was but he had no intentions of finding out.

His attention was directed to the window which he had recently been blasted through as a pair of his troopers appeared in search of him.

“General!” One of them greeted while both trained their blasters on the unconcerned Harley. “Orders, Sir?”

“She is not a threat to us,” Hux informed the duo while Harley let out a loud 'HEY!' behind him, “My communicator is broken so send out instructions that the remaining troops are to withdraw. Our information was incorrect and there is no Resistance presence here.”

Indicating one of the pair, he spoke again, “You. Give me your blaster.” Without hesitating the trooper marched over and presented Hux with his blaster. “Now leave.”

“Yes Sir.” Both troopers nodded and disappeared quickly to carry out his instruction.

“I must leave,” he addressed Harley again, “but I will leave you with a gift.”

“Take this blaster,” he handed it to her and she held out her hands and made a grabby motion, “as a sign of goodwill. This city has some interesting points which I have a further interest in. When I return would you be willing to organise a meeting with both yourself and this 'Red'?” If she refused then he would still return but it would be with the full force of the First Order behind him and he would prefer to avoid that if possible.

“I can do that! You're kinda weird but i'm sure Pammy will agree to at least meet ya!” Harley grinned, “And thanks for the gun! But I don't have anything to give you back!” She pouted as she patted down her costume.

“It is not necessary. I am ha-” He responded but was cut off and he felt her smack her lips onto his in a full kiss.

Too shocked to even move, he stood still as she continued to press her lips to his.

He was unaware of the customs of this planet but he hoped that this was not some form of pact-signing or betrothal. Not that he was entirely averse to the idea. The woman had an undeniable allure to her and he could tell that beneath the face paint she was quite beautiful.

Plus she was clearly trained in combat and possessed a great strength.

But this entire experience had been too weird for him to even consider making anything greater than a vague promise that he would return.

Eventually, Harley pulled away and Hux was pleased to note that her face paint had not transferred to himself.

“And that's us even.” She nodded, pleased with her solution. “Well, it's been fun Mistah! When ya come back to Gotham just ask about for Harley Quinn. I'll be here somewhere. See ya soon!” She called out and, without waiting for him to respond, flipped away from his position and disappeared through one of the small holes in the ceiling which led to the roof.

Left alone with his thoughts, Hux stood dumbly as he sorted through the events which had just occurred. From the battling creatures to the strange woman, almost everything here was a complete mystery to him. And Hux did not like mysteries.

Sighing again, he pulled himself over the broken window and emerged back onto the street. His personal ship was nearby and he kept up a strict pace as he half-ran towards it.

He made a mental note to relate all of this new information to the Supreme Leader as soon as he had full-access to his ship communicator but he decided to leave out the specifics of his encounter with the possibly crazed, strength-enhanced, female warrior who also claimed to be a doctor.

That required further though on his behalf and he amused himself by considering his options.

When he eventually did return, he was sorely tempted to offer her a job as his personal bodyguard. He suspected that she possessed the skill to protect him from potential assassins and her appearance alone would be enough to momentarily throw off even the most unshakeable pursuer.

And besides, he mused, she already had the correct colour scheme.

 


End file.
